Chapter One: Reno
‘HEY, are you up to Kevin’s tonight? He’s throwing a party and as I overheard this morning, many girls are invited too. You coming?’
Jonah’s voice plus his upfront face before me made me startled a little. ‘Damn, Jonah. It’s still 8 am.’ I hissed as I poured the cereal into the white bowl with the ‘Ayam Jago’ icon. Such an icon in my hometown.
‘So what? Does the time make a big deal for talking about tonight’s party?’ Jonah shrugged as he opened the fridge to get a full bottle of milk. ‘Look, Reno, I know you’re still upset about last week. But, life’s move on, right? Even I heard Kate had a new boyfriend already.’
Now I’m rolling my eyes as hearing the popular girl’s name on the campus while a spoonful of cereal goes inside my mouth. ‘You know what? You’d better make haste because I bet you told me that Mr. Chen’s the first lecturer this morning.’
Jonah’s eyes widened as he realized. He ran off abruptly to his room, now popped up again with his backpack, polo shirt, and jeans towards my ritual with the cereal. ‘Let’s wish that Mr. Chen’s absent today.’ He chatted indistinctly while trying to tie the shoelaces in front of flat’s the door.
Right after suspecting that I’m finally alone, Jonah’s voice still filled the whole flat, ‘Oh, hey, Gina. Wanna meet Reno?’
That name. I tilted my head a little and felt somewhat intrigued by hearing that name. It’s been three months since I heard that but I have never found out who–or what’s behind it. Simply put, I experienced an odd sensation in my gut as I heard it.
Finally, a dark-haired lady came inside my flat. She smiled at Jonah first, and then at me. Her face is always beaming when come inside my flat. When we met each other’s eyes, I looked away instantly.
This girl, somehow I think she treasured something essential.
For the record, it’s been six times Gina showed up in my flat this month. She’s been like this for about three months and it is still a mystery to me.
Why would she come here almost every week? Why would she specifically come here to meet me? Not Jonah, she doesn’t even care about him.
We’re not even close on campus — oh, I got something. Is it because of tonight’s party? Is she getting close to me because she wanted to get a pair to come to the party?
Such a visioner then.
‘Gina, what’s the matter today?’ I asked her as she took care of her plants in the window.
Her soft voice filled the entire flat, ‘Nothing, Reno. I’m here for the cacts.’
‘What?’
‘The cacts. Cactuses.’ She smiled at me while taking one of the plants to me, like the proudest Mama to her grown plants. ‘Oh, you’re having a morning class after this?’ she asked as she put it back where it belonged.
I nodded while washing my plate. ‘So, you’re here just for the cactuses?’
Now I heard her giggles. ‘You know you can’t trust your stuff with Jonah, right?’
I nodded, again, just for respect. I don’t get it why would she ever put cactuses under Jonah’s supervision? That’s unusual for him to be trusted with other people’s objects. Clearly.
‘Aw, who’s this cute little knitted bear?’ Gina’s voice in the main room is quite distinct to me who’s in my room grabbing my jacket and backpack for my morning class. ‘Is this yours?’ she asked again.
‘Yup, Kelly gave it to me last night.’ I told her as walked outside my room, giving her signals to get out of this flat — otherwise, she’d be alone.
Ah, you remember when I said ‘her face is beaming’ before? Now I take my words back. She looked — I don’t know — frowning?
‘What? What’s wrong?’
‘You’re close with Kelly now?’ she asked, rather indistinctly to me who’s standing next to her. ‘You’re coming with her to tonight’s party?’
Two questions in a row. I stuttered a little bit. ‘We’re just casual… I bet so.’ I assured her — wait, why should I assure her? Removing away the stupid question in my head, I kept talking, ‘And for the party, I’m still not deciding whether to come or not. You coming?’
Gina exhaled. Now I could see her sparkling eyes.
Wait, do her eyes always sparkle like that? — Oh, man, it is still in the morning, but I think I don’t need today’s morning class for going crazy. Little did I know, Gina’s eyes are teary this morning — still, sparkling.
‘I’m coming, but with you.’ she answered clearly, without a single hesitation.
I thought my heart skipped a beat. ‘W-wait, what? Why would — ’
‘See ya at the campus.’ She left.
‘WHAT’S up, bro? You’re acting quite bizarre today. Mrs. Webber got you lost or what?’ I lifted my head when Jonah’s voice touched my ears around this crowded cafeteria. Mrs. Webber was my lecturer before this lunch break. ‘Oh, anyway, are you coming to tonight’s party? The real question here.’
I paused my mouth from chewing a sandwich. ‘Gina asked me to come with her.’ I answered, letting out an exhale.
‘She what?’ Jonah repeated, but with his dramatic reaction — as in opening his mouth widely with his hands covering it. ‘Oh my, I almost scream.’
Rolling my eyes, I replied, ‘You and hyperbole are probably the best match so far.’ while finishing my sandwich and continuing, ‘Look, Jonah, I still don’t get what she’s doing in the flat almost every week. Visiting ‘the cacts’? Gosh, that’s not even a word — and also, why? Why did she do that? To meet you? To meet me? Really?’
Jonah now looks uncertain. His dramatic reactions somehow went away and flew by the summer wind. ‘Did she say anything to you during her visit this morning?’ he muttered.
‘What?’ I’m frowning my forehead by now. You can tell that I don’t have any idea about this at all. ‘What are you talking about?’
Hesitant, Jonah’s eyes moved away from my demanding eyes. ‘She’s just that good, Reno.’ he answered, ‘that’s all I can tell for now.’
‘What again, Jonah?’
‘Just go with her to tonight’s party. It’d be a great decision. You’ll make an amazing couple too, right?’ Jonah spoke hastily, leaving me to look super confused in front of him. ‘And by the way, why don’t you ask who will go to the party with me tonight?’
Letting out another exhale, I glared at Jonah with my eagle eyes. After a single delayed, I hissed, ‘You’re hiding something, aren’t you?’
‘I’m not — oh, hey, Alice.’ Jonah’s getting distracted as a girl sat beside him all of sudden. He’s smiling too widely, distracting himself from the scary glare. ‘Reno, do you know Alice? She’s the one who’ll go to the party with me tonight.’
I cleared my throat as still defense my gut, ‘You’re not answering my question, Jonah. What do you mean by your words?’
The people around our table gave suspicious glances as I–accidentally–shouted at Jonah. Some of them were whispering to one another, talking about what was happening in this large cafeteria.
‘Sorry.’ I nodded my head to some of the people around our table. ‘Nothing’s happening.’
A few minutes passed, and Jonah finally found his voice back. ‘Reno, I’m sorry I couldn’t tell you anything. But, if there’s something you want to know; Gina’s good. You should befriend her — and also, she’s popular too — oh, not like Kate, but you know what I mean. Some of the guys are after her. She’s also smart, pretty–and witty too, I believe.’ he’s standing at his chair, with Alice beside him. ‘See ya tonight, bro.’
Now that made me frown. I don’t understand. What’s going on exactly?
That very moment, when I finally decided to leave this table, I lifted my head out of the blue. At this moment, I caught Gina’s eyes.
She’s standing there, looking small and frail in this room with a vast ceiling and rustic views from the windows afar. I still don’t understand what’s happening between us, but I couldn’t deny that I feel the familiarity inside her.
Man, what did this girl do to me exactly?
We’re still standing like that for a while, no one getting close to another, just standing still. As if the clock stops ticking. As if the cafeteria was just an empty hall.
At that particular moment, I still froze in that position until I felt my heart thumping quite hard for no reason.
Surprised by that, I cut off my staring competition with Gina, immediately leaving the cafeteria for the afternoon class.
As I walked away, I knew I should get my focus back to the upcoming class, but why wouldn’t this brain work together? Why did I have the illusion of my date with Gina to the party tonight? Also, my heart was still beating fast inside. This isn’t my usual.
Damn, what is wrong exactly?
IT’S Saturday evening, just a few hours until tonight’s party, and I haven’t decided whether to come or not. As far as I know, Gina’s flat is not that far from mine. It took only ten minutes to walk, but for me — it took the whole sixty minutes to make this life-changing decision.
Now I’m being hyperbole.
‘You won’t change anything if you’re still like this for the upcoming hours, bro.’ Jonah exhaled at me while he put on the silver blazer for tonight’s party–just Jonah being Jonah. ‘Look, I can’t help you with anything, but I have to go to Alice’s. She might be waiting for me already.’
And just like that, he was gone behind the flat’s door. Leaving me alone inside with the scent of his perfume lingering all over the flat.
‘Geez, he’s really into Alice doesn’t he?’ I mumbled as raised from my bed to grab some coffee in the kitchen.
For this whole day after that cafeteria situation, things are going well between me and Jonah. We chat like nothing was happening, like the topic about Gina was never being talked about. Frankly, I even didn’t have any courage to bring this up, because I still felt bewildered until now about myself and of course, about Gina.
Somehow, I felt a part of me think that there was something more to her. Something I still haven’t figured out.
Feeling baffled, I drank my coffee and my eyes moved to the cactuses that Gina always took after these last few weeks. Still have no idea about that, my eyes are shifted to the knitted bear that was placed on the kitchen counter.
Her sparkling eyes, her frowned face this morning when she talked about Kelly — I exhaled, again.
A few minutes passed until I finished my coffee and my cell phone clinked. It’s Jonah says, ‘Go to Gina’s now or never. Time’s clicking.’
I scoffed at first and then groaned in return. Man, this is harder than I thought. After trying to repelled anything that happened today, I finally grabbed my sage green sweater. Combined with my khaki chino pants, I murmured some magic words as decided to go to Gina’s by walk.
This hot summer evening and my hands are perspiring and freezing like the snow.
‘AH, Reno is here! Ginaaa, he’s here.’ I stood in front of Gina’s flat feeling awkward. My heart kept pounding as I walked to this place, obliging myself to stop several times to calm myself down.
Susan, Gina’s roommate, is smiling cheerfully as catching my form. ‘I knew you’d come.’ She added, also ready to go to Kevin’s.
I replied with a clumsy smile. My hands are still freezing and it was so obnoxiously frustrating. Why would these hands shake as well? Oh, God. It just goes beyond my imagination.
I tried to keep my mind busy while assuming that Susan keeps her time voluntarily just because she wanted to make sure that I’d come to pick up Gina. I’m scanning my eyes around the flat. It was full of Gina and Susan’s pictures, including their family on each frame. A few small plants were placed on the window, and I could find another one on top of the fridge.
‘Ah, there you are. Looking dazzling, sis.’
Susan’s bright voice made my eyes move again to the center flat. And, there she is, complete with her little black dress and wavy hair, looking dazzling as Susan said. Flabbergasted, even I would say that ‘dazzling’ is an understatement for Gina.
She’s breathtakingly beautiful and other gorgeous words that I could put into sentences to describe this girl tonight.
Wait, what?
Another wild thought, I do have in mind is that… I kind of knew that dress. Those ruffles on the front, those accents–simplicity at its best, but Gina just enhanced it in the perfect way she could. I just thought that I had seen that before. Even though I still have no idea where or when that was exactly.
‘Thank you for coming. I feel grateful that you make it.’ Gina smiled as she walked toward me who was still stunned. Making me deny anything that crossed my mind before. My heart beats faster than ever. Oh, God, this is not good. ‘You ready to go or — ’
‘Yeah sure, let’s go.’ Absentmindedly, I also stammered a bit as replied. I turned back towards the flat’s door, hurriedly leaving the place so that I could calm myself down over Gina’s appearance.
KEVIN’S place was quite crowded tonight. Surely though, he invited almost all his friends all across the degree on campus. It includes Kate the ‘Miss Popular’, Jonah and Alice — new couple alert, and of course, me and Gina.
We arrived at the place after fifteen minutes bus ride. It was a casual ride, though. We did not talk much but were fully aware that we felt calmer as we stayed on each other’s side.
I also realized that the familiarity with Gina was increasing tonight. Still not knowing what that meant, I decided not to think about it just for tonight only.
‘Wow, it’s been a while since I went to a party.’ Gina murmured, looking around the place, finding something interesting except another guest who just wanted to puke in front of her.
I nodded, it’s been a while for me too. ‘Wanna seek a quieter corner around?’ I asked, purely feeling that the main hall of Kevin’s place was just too loud with noisy music and chatty guests.
Gina smiled. Agreed without saying anything.
In the following situations, we ended up eating some cupcakes with white wine in Gina’s hand, and tequila in mine. We started talking casually — but, still, kept the sensitive topic out of my head.
Kevin’s place is a large one. It has a spacious lawn, along with a mini water fountain at one of the corners. Some foods are placed on the outside, making Gina and I stand by on that spot so that we couldn’t have any trouble finding dinner.
‘So, how did you decide to come to the party at last?’ Gina asked while sipping her wine, looking around as Kevin who owned the party was nowhere to be found — nor Jonah and Alice. Though I knew that she’d seen Kate the Miss Popular already. She’s just basically everywhere.
I shrugged and considered the answer, ‘Just a little push from Jonah, I guess.’
Gina holds up her giggles. ‘What did Jonah do exactly? He just made a record.’ she added, ‘I knew you dislike the crowds.’
I hold up my words. My hands were grasping the tequila before clearing my mind with it. Honestly, I have never realized that fact before. No one ever had. Why would Gina, a girl who visited my flat for three months in a row realize that before anyone else?
I let out a sigh. Tried to muster the courage by asking, ‘You knew?’
Gina lifted her gaze, letting our eyes meet. For this one minuscule of time, I could feel the tiniest of her that I have ever known after all the moments passed between us. What–my mind got cut off as I felt a brief twitch in my head.
Gathering any words, I opened up my mouth, ready to convey any thoughts–
‘Hey, man! Finally! We met at last!’ Gina and I got startled as we shifted our gaze toward the loud voice. ‘How’s the party? You like it?’ Kevin smiled brightly, complete with a military-style yellow jacket — plus, it’s full of glitter.
Gina’s smiling as she replied, ‘Wonderful party, Kev. We’re enjoying it a lot.’
Kevin nodded at both me and Gina, still smiling. ‘Make sure you’re staying until the end of the party, because oh, wait — ’ he paused when he found a ply of thread on Gina’s hair. Kevin naturally put that off right away, making me too aghast watching it beside him. ‘Ah, you have to take more care of yourself, Gina. You know I don’t like you being a clumsy one, okay?’
What?
‘I know, thanks.’ Gina replied with a polite smile, not realizing I put up a mad glare between them. ‘I’ll be more careful next time.’
Kevin gave two thumbs up as he left that spot, searching for other guests to ask about–I don’t know, anything, perhaps? He might think that his reputation at the campus is really important though — start with this event.
‘Wanna search another spot, Reno?’ Gina spins her head towards me. She seemed puzzled by my glare at her. ‘What?’
I cleared my throat. Then exhaled and scoffed. Man, this sensation in me will take no mercy. I hate myself tonight. Gina and all the moments that pass between us annoy me in a way I don’t understand at all.
‘I don’t like you being clumsy.’ I stated at her at last, saying whatever my mind has for now. ‘Don’t let another man do that to you.’
Now that we’re both stunned. What did I say? A very stupid statement indeed.
Gina went speechless. Her eyes sparkled with tears immediately. ‘Then, what am I supposed to do, Reno?’ she asked, making me dismayed myself from letting the tears film her eyes.
I closed my eyes, feeling entirely baffled by all this. My mind won’t be quiet for now, it’s digging for something more. Something that I haven’t figured out. I had a sudden thought that perhaps–it wasn’t a good idea to go to a party together with her in the first place.
All of a sudden, I felt my head get struck. I groaned and staggered. Almost fell off from where I stood, making Gina gasp in shock. ‘Oh my God, Reno, you okay?’ she asked with a soft but scared voice. Even I could catch that fear.
Blinking and thinking ‘what was that thing?’, I tried to stand up again. ‘I’m okay. I just need to go to some quieter place.’ I replied while catching my breath.
Gina nodded and agreed without any protests.
Then, we made it out of Kevin’s party which kept increasingly rousing. We walked side by side in silence, lost in each other’s thoughts. Too many things that I don’t understand these past few times. Too many mysteries, and too many unanswered questions.
Including the wild thought such as, ‘Am I a real Reno Prasetyo?’
Tried to evict the scattered thoughts, I’m skimming the night views around. After three months on campus and I just realized that the Sussex area at night was really beautiful. It was dark surrounding us, but along with the yellow lights at every corner of the street, I thought it was kind of a magical moment.
I hadn’t got to feel about this for quite a long time, so I need to embrace it in my memory.
Gathered the courage, I asked, ‘You okay?’ in the middle of the walk. My head began to feel normal again, thus I didn’t want to make Gina feel concerned anymore.
She’s had enough of tonight’s weirdness with me.
Gina lifted her head and nodded once. ‘As long as you’re good, then I am.’ She smiled.
I thought my heart skipped a beat. Clearing my throat, I replied, ‘Sorry about that. I knew you were enjoying that party before. You should’ve stayed there, not — ’
‘I have to make sure that you’re truly okay, Reno. Then, there’s no reason why I should’ve stayed there.’ Gina pointed out.
I almost countered back to Gina, but I stopped realizing that Gina and I are on the pier right now. A very popular pier all across the UK. My head was thumping softly, still digging something deep.
Still having no idea, I joined Gina who started stepping onto the sand. This summer night the air began to chill. I spun my head around, enjoying the wonderful landscape surrounding us. Amidst the vast candy skies above, and the breeze that blows the cool summer night wind, I somewhat feel that I had encountered this moment a long, long time ago.
We walked on the beach in silence. Relished the serene moments in that iconic place, getting far away from the nightclubs before us.
‘Gina, wait. I wanted to ask you something.’ I started as reached out to Gina’s steps ahead of me. Gina caught my eyes towards her, my heart beating faster as I keep guessing what would happen in the next move. ‘How did you know that I dislike the crowd?’
There was a glimpse paused between us. Gina seemed to process my random question, and she laughed groggily as she said, ‘It just looked clearly on your face, Reno. How could I not be aware of it?’
I gave no expression as the response. I cleared up my throat and said softly, ‘No one even realized about that before. Including me. Including Jonah.’
Gina felt stiffened a bit. ‘I–’
‘You knew me for a long time, didn’t you? It’s not like three months ago. It’s been a long time.’ I conveyed, without hesitation. Gina seemed to hold her breath as she heard this question. I tried so hard not to get distracted by her sparkling eyes toward me — God, it’s one of the hardest things to do for now. ‘Be honest.’ I managed to keep going on.
‘W-what do you mean by that?’ She asked timidly.
I was about to defend Gina’s question when an unknown man approached us, seemed quite drunk with his body staggered back and forth, putting a faint smile on her.
I sensed something bad.
‘Girl, you looked gorgeous in that black dress.’ he said, a strong alcohol scent smelled straight from his mouth. ‘Do you mind if–’
That all happened.
I hit that man right on the face with great strength abruptly. I don’t like this guy. He seemed dangerous to Gina. Speaking about her, she already screamed in fear. Two men are involved in a fight immediately. Right on the beach, not too far from the most famous pier in the UK. If only that could hit the world record, I thought.
In the following situations, everything was quite a chaos. That unknown man — turns out didn’t come alone. His two friends are coming and helping him strike me.
Gina cried hard while–with the corner of my eyes saw that she was trying to reach out her cell phone inside her purse.
With this bleeding mouth, I managed to hiss something, ‘Stay away from her.’
Right after that, I got blank as something hit my head hard. Along with Gina shouting my name terrifyingly.
The last memory that I could recall was Gina beneath the candy sky, smiling at me.
‘Promise that we’ll stay together.’ And her eyes sparkled.
To be continued.
